Best days of our lives!

I love my friends so much! We do amazing, funny, random things all the time.

Friday we made kites out of newspaper, wooden dowels and glue, it was so much fun!

We also made a "bomb" out of fireworks and blew up a teddy bear. My friends ex-girlfriend gave it to him and he wanted to blow it up. haha It was so much fun! The bear didn't completely blow up so we are going to try it again later.

The other day thing we did that was so funny was we had a "Assorted" party

We went to Smiths and had a hunt for foods that had the word assorted on them. We ended up with pudding, jello, fruit by the foot, tootsie pops and Popsicles. It was so fun! I love doing random things.

Another thing we do when we get frustrated is burn our feelings. HAHA we write a list of all the things we hate or wish would be different, and then we set the paper on FIRE!! :) haha It's actually very therapeutic!

Also, AGGIE basket ball. We had so much fun watching basketball, and playing it. I'm a true Aggie fan! :) We went to a ton of games. I have only missed 2 games since I started going.

Last but not least, I want to share what I did for a lady I work with. She is old, and lives a lone. She's never been married and her parents are both dead. Her mother got really mean in her old age as she developed dementia. I feel bad for her because she's always alone, and she gets treated like garbage at work. My room mate and I decided to "Heart Attack" her. We made paper hearts and cookies (that ended up burning) And put them all over her door. It was so much fun and I felt so good about it! She told a lady that we work with that it made her day :)

Well that is it for now. I am loving life lately and I'm so glad that I decided to change some things up in my life. I just heard a quote, "everybody is looking for change, they just want it to come from someone else." I moved to a different city 7 months ago and it was one of the best things I could do, and it didn't involve anyone else. I did it for me. Obviously I recognize the Lord's hand in my life, but I didn't put my trust in anyone else.

Dreams and their meaning

For those of you who know me well, you know that I have strange dreams all the time. Nearly every night, I had an exceptionally crazy dream last night

My roommate told me that she would love to have someone analyze my dreams, so I did just that. I looked stuff up on line and this is what I came up with. I'll put the interpretation in italics after the significant parts.

The Dream:

(I'm not going to tell you every aspect of my dream, just the bits and pieces)

I dreamed that I was helping a little girl(who I don't know yet) learn how to swim. Swimming Pool To see a swimming pool suggests that you need to acknowledge and understand your feelings. It is time to dive in and deal with those emotions. You need to cleanse yourself and wash away those past hurts.

Also there was a HUGE lady there, she was fatter than any person I've ever seen! Kind of like Aunt Marge from the Harry Potter 2 Book/movie (which I recently watched) Fat: To dream that others are fat, signifies prosperity. Consider also the phrase "it ain't over till the fat lady sings" and how you need to wait for the final result and not assume the outcome

The scene changes and I am at a party with my Family and close family friends.

I looked down at my right arm and I had blisters all over it. I could literally see my skin bubbling up and forming nasty sores. Blister: To dream that you have a blister, indicates that some minor annoyance or problem is draining your energy and time. Consider how you may have gotten the blister.

I went to the hospital to see if they could fix it, while on my way there I developed Meningitis and couldn't get in to see a doctor. Illness: To dream that you have an illness, denotes despair, unpleasant changes, or some emotional breakdown. The illness may be symbolic of your inability to cope with a situation. You see that being ill is an easy way out. On a more direct note, this dream may signal you to pay closer attention to your health especially to the areas of body revealed in the dream. While at the hospital I saw some people in my student ward playing the piano, and a few of them I know don't play in reality. Piano: to dream about someone playing a piano, indicates a quest for harmony in your life. Consider where the piano is placed as a clue as to what aspect of your life needs accordance.

My friends were concerned about me and asked if I was going to be okay. I answered no because I was dying of "skin cancer and meningitis" Illness: To dream that you have an illness, denotes despair, unpleasant changes, or some emotional breakdown. The illness may be symbolic of your inability to cope with a situation. You see that being ill is an easy way out. On a more direct note, this dream may signal you to pay closer attention to your health especially to the areas of body revealed in the dream.

They were also playing with a container full of smooth stones, Rocks: To see a rock in your dream, symbolizes strength, permanence, stability and integrity, as conveyed in the common phrase "as solid as a rock". The dream may also indicate that you are making a commitment to a relationship or that you are contemplating some changes in your life that will lay the groundwork for a more solid foundation. Alternatively, a rock represents stubbornness, disharmony and unhappiness. For some odd reason I poured strawberry milk in with them. Milk: To spill milk in your dream, symbolizes a loss of faith, opportunity, and trust

One last scene, it seems to be a repeat of another dream I had, I was standing on a residential street in a poor part of town, and I was running with a person I have recently started getting to know more. I dream about running a lot.

Running: To dream that you are running with someone, signifies cooperation

I normally don't buy into things like this, but all of these things were so evident to the things I've been concerned about lately. I have been worried about my health, and the piano in the hospital shows that I am trying to find harmony in my health. The here are a lot of other significant parts to this dream that if I were to share them all it would be way too long. It's just crazy to see how things play a part to my dreams. I need to let go of hurt feelings, loss of love, and accept that I am not the one in control. I have been struggling with people lately and am so upset that I am "undesirable" to men. I need to just go on a mission and forget all of them for a while. That was kind of pointed out by the rock analogy. I am doing things now that will lay the groundwork for my future, and I just need to accept that.

Well, this is significantly long enough, but I just wanted to post that I am going to start mission papers this month :) I'm so excited to serve the Lord and work harder than I ever have before. I look forward to the blessings that my family will have because of my willingness to serve the Lord in what seems to be the "prime of my life"

Colin Hay - I Just Don't Think I'll Ever Get Over You

One never gets over the loss of a true love, they merely are forced to cope with the memories and void that remains in the heart and soul. This song captures the essence of this dilemma that is not without anguish and seems to go on without end.

This is probably my new favorite song of all time. It describes perfectly the way I feel about what went down with my (cheesy as it may be) first love. It was hard to let go of the feelings I had for him. But totally worth it. I love the line where he sings "Even though I may soon feel the touch of love, I just don't think that I'll ever get over you" This is how I feel lately. I know that one day I will find someone, but that day is just not today.

The true meaning of Christmas

This Christmas was one of the best I've had so far.

My funds have been super lacking so I didn't have much money to spend on gifts.

I was feeling badly about this, when my bbff Jeanie called me up asking if I wanted to go to a discount book store with her to get gifts for people. I jumped at the invite because 1) we don't get to hand out much anymore and 2) because I needed to get something for people in my life.

So we went there and only a few books really popped out at me. One was a Mother Goose book that reminded me of my child hood. I got this for Amber because she loves Mother Goose, and has another book of her stories, (this was an ABC book). She opened it Christmas morning and LOVED it! So I was really happy about this.

Another was a book of old short songs that I got for my dad. He loves that sort of thing and the minute I saw it I knew it was for him. I didn't really recognize a lot of the songs in it, but there were some like "My Bonnie" and "Sipping Cider through a straw" that my dad sang to us when we were kids. My mom later came up to me and informed me that mine was his favorite gift. That made me so happy because he is such a hard person to find gifts for!

Attached to every one's gifts was a personalized hand written letter to the members of my family. The reason I did this was because I didn't feel like Micheal's (my brother in law) gift was very personalized. His letter was pretty long, and VERY heart felt. I told him about how I love having him as a big brother, and that he's such a good example to me of so many things. I got all mushy-gushy on him and he love it! He bragged to Amber saying that his was longer than hers.. whatever, but it was fun! I felt like this Christmas wasn't as materialistic as others have been.

I took time to really put thought into the gifts I gave people, and to be honest, you can't beat the fact that I got everything for less than $20! (for 8 people I might add)

I'm going to make this a goal, that from now on, I will make my gifts more sentimental and meaningful than in years past.

The true meaning of Christmas isn't about gifts, or money, or things... it's about people, and love, and family. I hope I can remember that.

1950's T.V family

Today I finally made it home for the Holidays, we rolled into town around 12 pm. It is so good to be back home.
I just wanted to post really quickly about some cute things that happened to me today.


So let me set the scene for you; my Grandparents are over for Christmas Eve dinner, every one is getting ready to go read the famous Christmas story, sing some songs, and open our pj's.
Before anyone came in the front room Jacob, my 11 year old brother pulls me in, sits me right next to him on the couch, and insists that I sit right next to him. He gets this really serious look on his face and says "Shaela, we never just talk. So... lets talk. Do you like me?"
It was so stinking cute! Shortly after that he got distracted and ran around the room for a few more minutes till every one else came in the room.
Jacob is seriously the cutes little 11 year old I know. When I lived with my parents I would always read him bed time stories, and we would pray together each night. I really miss that. But it's fun to see him growing up into a great kid!

My dad was all goofy today at the store where we met my parents when we got into town. I was looking around for my mom, and I see my dad and he's hiding around a corner, then I see him spring out at my mom and sister just laughing like a 4 year old. It was so funny. For any of you who know my dad you know he's usually very reserved in public, and melo. So this came as a pleasant surprize to see him just let loose and be goofy!

I just love my family.

Also, Amber my 22 year old sister told me a couple of funny things today:
1) We have so much fun and laugh all the time, so Amber said "Shae, when we get older and our husbands die, we HAVE to live together. We just have so much fun, and laugh at each others jokes all the time!" I'm paraphrasing, but it was probably the funniest thing I've heard all month!
2)We were talking about chickens and how funny they walk, and Amber bursts out and says "Chickens look so retarded when they walk, it's no wonder we eat them!!"


Oh man, my family is so funny!

Life is good!

I feel the need to thank my Heavenly Father for everything in my life. I am blessed with so many graces that help me in ways that I don't even know where to begin.

1)My room mates Emily and Kelsie are amazing girls and wonderful examples to me. They make life at home so much fun! I didn't have that last year, and it's nice to feel like I'm part of a family unit again while away from home.

2)The ward I am in is amazing! Yet another thing I didn't have last year. I distanced myself from them a lot last year because I didn't want to get connected to things too much and then have to move. I pushed people away from me intentionally so that I wouldn't have to deal with the loss of yet more friends. This year I decided to make sure that I didn't do that again. I may not know all these people my whole life, but I sure as heck will have fun with them while I can. I am not going to let fear of loss get in my way of living life.

3)I finally have someone in my life that I am a little bit interested in. Someone who I can have hope of future events with. That's all I'm going to say because it's still very very very new to me and far away from becoming anything. But lets just say I'm getting the vibe that he's feeling it too. :)

4)My parents are amazing people and I love them so much! They have faith in me even when I fall short sometimes. Sometimes I feel bad for being a disappointment to them over some things, but I know that I'm a good person and I try to do what's right. That's all because of them. They are great examples in my life of faith in God and reliance on his grace. Sometimes I struggle with that, I feel like I have to do everything on my own, and I forget to let the Lord help me.

5)The love that I feel from my Savior every day of my life. Even when it's epic fail #84, He still loves me and wants me to come back home to Him. I can't wait for that day, but I know I must.

I didn't mean for this to be all sentimental, but there you go.

I meant to say how completely awful I did on my Stats final. But luckily I have more to be happy for than to be upset about.

Beautiful to Him

It's been a while since a boy made me feel insecure about my weight...Maybe this is why it caught me off guard tonight when a complete stranger made me feel lower than I have in a long time.

So I'm driving to a movie with my friend as she was trying to give her brother directions to meet us there. She needed to give him something he left at home over the weekend. Then she suddenly puts him on speaker phone (I'm not exactly sure why she did, but the point is that I could hear everything he was saying) So he catches on to the fact that she's with someone, and asks who it is. She replied with a simple, "Oh that's Shaela, one of the girls I went to that Hotel Party with last week, remember? I showed you pictures.." and he responds "Oh the chunker?"

Yep, the chunker. It's kind of funny though because earlier today, a co worker told me that I look like I've lost weight, so I wasn't expecting that to happen.

I don't know why I let that get to me. In that moment I just brushed it off, but during the movie, I shed a few tears thinking about it. But I'm not going to let some punk from Illinois tell me that I'm not good enough. I don't want to be attractive to that kind of guy anyway. I'm sure he has a good heart and all that crap we're supposed to say about people we don't really know, But he's shallower that my bathroom sink, and I could care less if he doesn't find me attractive.

Look, I don't know if anyone even reads this blog, I'm sure no one has much of a reason to. But I just wanted to make this known maybe to myself more than anyone...I AM A BEAUTIFUL DAUGHTER OF GOD, AND HE LOVES ME!

I don't need to be a size 4 in order to be loved, plenty of people in this world aren't and they are perfectly happy. I realize that I am curvey, maybe even fat in some peoples eyes, But not in Gods eyes. He thinks that I am beautiful, and that's all I want to be, is Beautiful to Him.